8 Post-sex hygiene do’s and don’ts
From the spit, to the sweat, to any and all other bodily fluids summoned throughout the process of having outercourse or intercourse (not to mention any lubes or massage oils involved), sex is messy by nature. The chances of yourself, your partner, and your bed/floor/table/stairway getting stained and/or otherwise besmirched are high.
While some of us feel immediately called to leap out of bed and wash the cum from our hair, some of us can’t be bothered to move so much as a pinky finger within the allotted hour (or ten) of postcoital bliss.
While the post-sex measures you take—and how soon you take them—will undoubtedly depend on what exactly happens during sex, your preferences, as well as your personal risks of infection, the following post-romp hygiene dos and don’ts provide a baseline guide for sexual health.
1. Don’t use products that claim to ‘clean’ the vagina or vulva, and never use douches! When it comes to cleansing this area, less really is more. The vagina is a gorgeous, brilliantly designed, well-oiled, self-cleansing machine—you heard it here first. As such, there are precisely zero reasons to disrupt its highly sensitive microbiome with soaps, sprays, or other products. Stick to simply rinsing the vulva with warm water, or else washing with a mild, unscented soap before rinsing well and patting dry. As far as penis hygiene goes, a similarly gentle wash should do it—if the foreskin’s still intact, this is extra important, as it helps prevent semen buildup and infection.
2. Do pee right after sex (and ideally before sex too), especially if you’re prone to urinary tract infections (UTIs). As your body rids itself of fluids, any bacteria that might have made its way into your urethra during sex may also be flushed out. Peeing will also flush out stray sperm (so to speak), slightly reducing the likelihood of pregnancy. There’s no need to race to the bathroom the second you finish up—by all means, bask with your lover—but do try to pee within 20 minutes or so. Hot tip: keep a glass of water by your bed, and drink it between naughty acts 1 and 2. Not only is it hydration your body needs, but it also helps with the whole post-sex pee thing.
3. Don’t forget about discarded condoms. In other words, if you and your partner used a condom, don’t forget to dispose of it. Never do so, however, by trying to flush it down the toilet, because it’ll probably clog your drain, and no one wants to call a plumber in for that. Instead, once you've luxuriated sufficiently in your partner’s arms, be sure someone picks up that wrapper, ties the condom, and disposes of it by tossing in the bin. The last thing you want is to slip (or stick) on a spill as you’re walking across your room in the middle of the night—or worse, wake up in a spill because you forgot the condom in the bed.
4. Do shower without too much delay if you’ve had anal sex, rinsing your genital area to wash away any lingering bacteria. Gently pull back the vaginal folds and lift the clitoral hood, using warm water and a gentle soap or all-natural and unscented cleansing wipes. Always wipe the vagina and anus from front to back to avoid the transfer of bacteria from the anus to the vagina, as this can lead to infection. And for people with penises that have foreskin, the approach is similar—just be sure to pull the skin back so you can clean the entire head of the penis.
5. Don’t fall asleep wearing lingerie, a thong/g-string, or anything less breathable than cotton underwear. Ideally, wear nothing, and let your girl get some air for real. This will reduce excess moisture around the genitals, and reduce your risk of developing a yeast or other vaginal infection. For people with penises too, sleeping naked has its clear benefits: trapping the testicles in constricting or unbreathable fabric can be harmful to sperm.
6. Do clean your sex toys properly. If you and your partner use sex toys, make sure to clean them post-sex. Not only will this remove bacteria so they're squeaky clean and ready for your next go ‘round, but it’ll also help ensure they retain their quality. Dependent on the material it’s made with, each sex toy has specific cleaning instructions—be sure to follow them. For instance, high quality nonporous toys tend to be made of silicone, glass, metal, and ABS hard plastic, and you can wash them with a mild soap and water or special spray/wipes. Some materials can also be boiled.
7. Don’t forget to remove tampons before sex. While period sex can be all that and more, don’t get so caught up in the heat of the moment that taking it out slips your mind. If a penis, sex toy, or finger (or fist!) enters your vagina when you have a tampon still in there, it can push said tampon to the back of your vaginal canal, making it difficult to reach that handy li'l string. Don’t panic: your tampon can't really go anywhere further than the vaginal canal. That being said, the longer you forget it there, the more likely it is to become a hub for various infection-causing bacteria. Though rare, toxic shock syndrome (TSS) is a possibility in prolonged cases. If you’re unsure whether it's even in there, see a doc, stat.
8. Do wash/change your sheets if there is an obvious mess following sex. And most definitely wash your sheets between sexual partners. If you're having anal or period sex, or you anticipate squirting, or just because, you might want to put a towel down or use a waterproof mattress cover to make your post-coital cleanup a whole lot quicker.
Bottom line: those delicious, gasp-worthy postcoital moments are an ideal time to connect with your partner and enjoy the rush ‘n flush of feel-good hormones coursing throughout your sweet body—so don’t forget to be present, feel your body, and feel your feelings before you get too caught up in cleaning up.
Take at least a few moments to be together—cuddle, kiss, joke around. It’s a-okay to sleep in your natural, post-sex mess, though as mentioned, you'll probably want to at least shuffle to the bathroom to take a tinkle before passing out. And if the need to wash yourself off feels kinda pressing, you could always prolong the intimacy by showering together or even continuing the party in the shower. Be sure to ask your partner about their preferences, too, as chances are you won't have identical cleanliness needs. As always, communication is queen, baby.
Hot, clean, ’n dirty sex for all. <3
