Love and lust with a Virgo

The wisdom of the stars is ever-present and accessible in the day-to-day, if we choose to pay it any mind. Goddess knows that in matters of lust and love, we can all benefit from any resource we can get our hands on. While there are of course no exact formulas which lock a person into the dictates of their astrological destiny, there’s plenty of shockingly applicable insight to be gleaned, much of it quite specific. Take those (ofttimes underestimated) virginal maidens born under the sign of Virgo, between August 23 to September 22. If you’re in a relationship with one, why not take advantage of every opportunity to better understand what gets their motor humming; how to get past their outer wall of defenses; and the best ways of making ‘em howl with delight?

Here I offer you several of the most naughtily noteworthy traits belonging to your Virgo lover:

Plan, practice & perfect

Think of them as the 3 Ps of Virgo’s sensual code: planning, practicing, and perfecting. First, Virgos aren’t generally about spontaneous or experimental sexual encounters. They usually like to plan things out and stick to a routine so they know what to expect. Second, Virgos tend to embody the old adage “practice makes perfect” in all areas of life, and sex is no exception. If they’re into you, they may become somewhat obsessed with getting said routine right, and I mean really right: perhaps one of Virgo’s best qualities as a lover is their devotion to making sure their partner is totally satisfied. Third, although they have a reputation for being picky or prudish, in bed this translates to being masters of minute detail. So perfect your pleasure they shall.

If you want to turn your Virgo’s arousal up to 10, be sure to carve out time together in advance, and state your intentions, filthy as they are. Virgo planners love to have time to mull things over and get high on anticipation. You might also become attuned to the finer details of whatever you’re planning: the right visuals are always fun (i.e. a pair of black nylons, if that’s their thing), and the right type of touch might just send them over the edge (generally soft, drawn out, and thorough). It also never hurts to pay extra attention to hygiene: you might shower together as foreplay. But it’s worth noting that as perfectionist as they can be about certain things, Virgos are ultimately pretty down to earth, and completely unimpressed by flattery, glitz, or glam.

Wild & wordy

In spite of their reputation, Virgos are not inhibited. Rather, they’re just turned on by specific things—you know, like thoughtfulness, the kind that goes into top notch dirty talk. Many Virgos use sex as an opportunity to finally let loose and get in touch with their inner wild child, only their version of wild also happens to be wordy. Being the planners and visualizers that they are, words afford Virgos extra pleasure because they’re like another layer of carefully secured wrapping paper on a deliciously irresistible gift: they fuel anticipation and imagination. No to mention, unlike other earth signs, Virgos really like to talk about sex, so if you're a champion of open communication, but you also prefer to stay grounded, Virgo is the earthy equivalent of your perfect partner.

To stoke your Virgo’s sensual mind, you might pick up an illustrated sex book or video to check out together. When it comes to talking dirty, it’s important to find the right words because Virgos are verbal, but use the wrong words and you risk upsetting them. Be sensitive and perceptive to their reactions. Really, the best way to seduce a Virgo is to keep them engaged, and the best way to do that is to be their intellectual equal; they get turned on by analytical abilities and a sharp wit.

Submissive…& kinda kinky

Some partners to Virgo may become frustrated because they don’t always put in the effort to initiate sex. But actually, since most Virgos are naturally submissive, they get incredibly aroused by the idea of being a sexual slave who is “forced” to do indecent things. Virgos spend a lot of time in their head, so being ordered around is a welcome break. They have no trouble letting their partner take the reins, and they may even be into getting spanked. If you’re a naturally dominant type, you’re sure to get just as much out of this as you put in. If you’re not, know that Virgos tend to be surprisingly flexible sexually, and are willing to try new things (like being dominant), so long as they also get to play the submissive sometimes too. Voyeurism also, speaks to many a Virgo, as it is an act which does not require any initiating; it is passive, and they are an “innocent” bystander.

Since your Virgo has a fertile imagination, you might use your words (carefully) to tell them of your plans to take control. Tell them what you plan to do, how you plan to do it, and what you’ll expect of them. Additionally, take the time to set the atmosphere when you’re planning something with your sexy Virgo. Set out any props or toys in an orderly fashion. And no matter what naughty items are on the menu, never skip foreplay. Cuddles and caresses are the kindling that feeds a Virgo’s passion. Use body-on-body contact to wake that fire.

Quality over quantity

Virgos put a lot more stock in the quality of the sex they’re having than the numbers. If you’re with a Virgo, you may have noticed that they’re alarmingly okay with doing it once or twice a week (or less!)—as long as the sex is good, of course. If you’re well-matched, this won’t be alarming, but perfect. Would you rather have a questionable quickie everyday or a long, drawn out session that stays with you for days, but not quite as often?

If you’re devoted to your Virgo mate, you’d do well to work at being in the moment with them, sexually speaking. Making the most out of each and every sexual encounter without hungering for constant quick releases is the way to go. Of course, there’s always room for compromise, and chances are your Virgo will be amenable to a quick ’n spontaneous romp on occasion if you’re especially convincing.

Emotional loyalty a given

Virgos can be extremely choosey, particularly when selecting a partner. Most of ‘em would rather go without sex at all than settle for an empty-calorie one night stand. This means they’re very rarely guilty of emotional infidelity. Virgos find it arduous enough processing all the feels associated with just one relationship, never mind two or more. Physical cheating, however, comes a bit more easily to some Virgos, particularly if they’re not getting enough of that regular ‘practice makes perfect’ with their regular partner.

First off, when a Virgo chooses you, take it as a compliment. Second, since Virgos tend to love discussing sex, do your part to keep the channels of communication open—there’s no better way to inspire loyalty than to be honest, vulnerable, and loyal yourself. Let’s put it this way: if they’re the person for you, loyalty won’t even cross your mind because it won’t be an issue.

Bottom line: treat your sexy ’n sensitive Virgo well, and you’ll find you have nothing to complain about (literally). Where there’s a real connection, there’s a beautiful collision of minds, hearts and bodies just waiting to happen.

As far as compatibility goes, no one does Virgo better than Taurus, Capricorn and Pisces, with honorary mentions going to Cancer and Scorpio, but no matter what your sign, lusty love conquers all, so if it's worth it, you’ll know (chances are, you already do).